Ready For The Zombie War?

If so, you can start the cleansing by shooting yourself!

Today I was listening to an interview with Ted Nugent (rock musician, avid ourdoorsman and gun rights activist) today on the Alex Jones Radio Program. He said that most people in America are apathetic about most things that really matter and keen on things that don't. I think he's absolutely correct. It's what the "American Dream" has turned everyone in to. Many people throughout the years and throughout the wars have gone to their graves to fight against tyranny and to help establish and maintain the American Dream. These days most media outlets are bought, paid for and are far more concerned with what celebrities are doing rather than what is really important. Everyone has a Gizmo to waste their time and rot their brain. These things have turned the American culture in to a brain dead heap of boneheaded Living Dead. I wonder if that's what film director George Romero was getting at with his horror movies. Dawn Of The Dead was intended to be a lash out at consumerism in our society.

- "Why do they come here?"
- "I don't know? A memory? Something they used to do?"
- "This was an important place in their lives."
(referring to a shopping mall)

"Thats why it's called the American Dream, because you've got to be asleep to believe it" - The Great George Carlin

Walmart strikes again in the name of EVIL!

AC/DC has signed a deal which would make Walmart the EXCLUSIVE retailer authorized to sell their upcoming new album which is untitled at this time. HELLS BELLS! That's COLD HEARTED MAN! They sure do have BIG BALLS, I guess MONEY TALKS! I'd like to have been a FLY ON THE WALL of that DAMNED FUROR of a meeting. All I'm saying is that Walmart really has GOT YOU BY THE BALLS if you're an AC/DC fan! I will not buy that album COME HELL OR HIGHWATER! Walmart.. IF YOU WANT BLOOD, YOU GOT IT! You and your ALL SCREWED UP corporation is on a HIGHWAY TO HELL! You INJECT THE VENOM into hearts of the common man! I hope that this whole deal gets SHOT DOWN IN FLAMES! It's going to SHAKE YOUR FOUNDATIONS when you find the fans will STAND UP against this LANDSLIDE of shit! It's like we are all getting KICKED IN THE TEETH by Angus and the guys! ARE YOU READY for the MELTDOWN? COME AND GET IT, IF YOU DARE! We can't stand for this people! This is a ROCK AND ROLL DAMNATION!

STUPID! STUPID STUPID!

The DB Cooper mystery continues...

DB Cooper, the 70's era airline hijacker who got away with $200k and pulled off the coolest fucking heist ever is in the headlines again. A man who lived in Depoe Bay on the Oregon Coast apparently confessed the crime to his two sons years ago with instructions that it not be revealed until after he had died. The article also alleges that the man also gave his two sons keys to a safe deposit box in Vancouver, British Columbia where the ransom money is hidden. Here is a composite FBI sketch alongside a picture of the man who claims to be DB Cooper -

If it is revealed that this man is, in fact DB cooper, might I suggest exhuming the body and performing a thorough examination of this man's testicles? I just have to know if they are indeed made of fucking steel like I suspect!

Check out the KATU article here

Former Apollo Astronaut Says, "Fuck it! I'm old and I'm gonna die soon anyway.. Aliens are among us!"

A former Apollo Astronaut who walked on the moon for over 8 hours on Apollo 14 has stated that the Government has been withholding information about extraterrestrial life. DUH!!!!!

Watch this shit! This guy doesn't give a rip!

This is just so fucked on so many levels...

A man in custody in Multnomah County in Oregon (It's where I'm from, huuuraayyy!!) agreed to confess to a murder rap after the interrogators offered him a dinner of Chicken from KFC and Popeyes, Coleslaw, Mashed Potatoes and Gravy, A slice of carrot cake and some Haggen Daz Ice Cream! It reminds me of the torture tactics I read about that were used by the Nazi SS during World War II. They would bring in a Concentration Camp Inmate who'd obviously been starved to near death. On a stove would be a large pot of stew which filled the room with a pleasant, irresistable odor. They would question the inmate and tell him that he could have the whole pot of stew if he gives them the information they are seeking. So... YES I am comparing Multnomah County prosecutors to Nazi SS Interrogators, Rightfully so if you ask me! It's really not that far of a stretch! When you combine that with the illegal wiretapping and other constitutional violations that have been carried out by the authorities in recent years, theres no telling whats coming. We all better build secret rooms in our attics and store some food. I think that any competent attorney could probably successfully defend this guy after all this. I am not saying I think the guy is innocent or should be exonerated for his crimes he confessed to, I just think the police should be more careful in their tactics.

Gulag confession

A Tribute To The United States Government..

With few exceptions you are all a God forsaken clan of ...

The Answer to 1984 is 1776 - Alex Jones

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Much love to Willie Nelson...

Willie Nelson appeared on the first hour of the Alex Jones Radio Program on Wednesday. He agreed to have try to have a 9/11 Truth concert in New York on or around September 11th, 2008. The proceeds will go to the families of the victims and towards the heath care expenses of the first responders who were made sick from the toxic air. This will also give much needed exposure to 9/11 truth and also inform people about the governments plan to invade Iran in much the same meaningless way Iraq was invaded. Hopefully this event will be of such a magnitude that the media will not be able to ignore it like the Ron Paul Freedom March in Washington D.C.(district of criminals).

Willie Nelson, in addition to being a legendary music star has always looked after the needs of the less than fortunate. Farm Aid is a bright shining example of his tireless and selfless work for others. Thank you Willie Nelson!!!!

** Jesse Ventura also agreed to make an appearance! Thank you Jesse!

Read about this and other news here!

Lone Gunmen Episode Predicts 9/11 attack senario

View Clip Here

The Lone Gunmen was a spin-off of the X-Files. This episode originally aired March 4th, 2001 (6 months and 7 days before 9/11). It could be a strange coincidence but it sure is eerie.

It might be a good idea to get a handsfree (not bluetooth)

Cell Phone Dangers

Ghost Stories oooOOOOoooOOOooOOOOooo!!!

My best friend Ari called today and revealed to me that recently while he was in the thick of his adventure race ...in the middle of nowhere... He saw a naked man lurking in the woods! Ari wasn't the only person who saw this as others in his group questioned one another later if they'd seen the naked man. Immediately I suspected that it was probably an alien abductee that was dropped off in middle of the woods. Or maybe a hippie guy who decided to drop out of society and live naked in the woods. Ari has another explanation. He thinks that it was either a pervert jacking off in the woods, or maybe it was Matt (just kidding! sorry man couldn't resist!), or just maybe it was the spirit of someone!

I've known Ari over half my life and i've never known him to lie to me about anything. So I know that when he tells me he saw a naked man in the woods, I know he's not bullshitting me. We'll never know what it was.. Maybe.. JUST maybe it was the spirit of a naked man jacking off in the woods while watching the adventure racers! In my world, my sick twisted world, That's what it would've been.

Now I believe in fucking ghosts! I've had many experiences in the past that were too strange to ignore. The first situation I can remember happened when I was aged 9 or 10. My family was living uncomfortably in the barge on Neil street in Champaign. We had a dog named Smokey. Smokey suffered from seizures from time to time and it eventually got very bad. I remember waking up one morning to my Mother and Sister crying and I knew that Smokey had died. Smokey had a collar with a few metal tags which would jingle as he moved. For a long time after Smokey had died I distinctly heard the tags jingling throughout the house at night. Sometimes it would wake me up. Later when we got our new dog, Chuck, the jingling ceased immediately.

Occasionally, my good friend Daniel and I used to ride our bikes out to our friend's house late at night after we both got off work. We both worked at a music store which was near Neil and Springfield in Champaign. Our friend Brian lived way out in Urbana near Airport Road and High Cross Road. For those of you that might read this and not know the specifics... It's a long ass bike ride! We used to cut through a road that passed in front of Woodlawn Cemetery and behind Busey Woods in Urbana. There is arguably no spookier place in Champaign County at night than that stretch of road, Especially on bike! It really freaked Dan out to go that way. I used to intentionally ride through there to test my balls out. I even went and knocked on the huge mausoleum out front at midnight. I never saw shit. Although it always felt like I was being watched. Daniel claimed to have seen numerous ghosts as we rode through. Eventually he just flat out refused to go that way. We were both about 20 at the time and I always assumed he was fucking with me. Recently I asked him if he honestly saw ghosts out there and he reconfirmed that he did. A few people I know have claimed to have seen the "Blue Man Ghost" out there. My old boss at the music store claimed to have seen it up close. Years ago they found a body of a young man in Busey Woods with no apparent cause of death. Could he have seen the Blue Man Ghost and just died of fright after shitting himself? Or visa versa? I dropped acid with my friend Robert and we walked through Busey Woods all night years ago. We walked and talked about crazy nonsense from dusk till dawn. We never saw any ghosts. Although I think that the ghosts were probably a little afraid of Robert. Thats where some people go when they die. They go to a room with no exit and Robert explains the world to them. Welcome to hell.

Then There is my good friend Matt. Matt has been a #1 pimp homey for a long time now. I used to stay the night at his house and drink his Coca Cola all the time. Matt's house is fucking haunted! A friend of ours swears he saw a girls spirit in the bathroom mirror. Matt's house has a family room which used to be an attached garage. We all hung out in there mainly and played music, watched TV or whatever. His bathroom is through the living room and down a hall. Late at night when you had to take a leak there was nothing I dreaded more than making my way to that bathroom. I am sure that I am not alone in this but it felt like a thousand eyes were watching you. It always felt cold, and I don't mean the thermostat was set low, it's a different kind of cold. Matt was into all sorts of strange esoteric religions and the Necronomicon at the time. They did incantations which were supposed to release spirits and shit. One night they were fucking around with an Ouija Board and this plastic light cover came crashing down from the ceiling and smashed up his guitar. Another time they were doing some spells of some kind of strange shadowy figure appeared and kept watching them all night. Eventually it went away or disappeared.

More recently my ex-girlfriend and I were at a abandoned mental institution in Ashmore, Illinois called Ashmore Estates. Ashmore is now an attraction which has a haunted house on Halloween and a few sleep-overs for the brave souls(fucking idiots) a few times per year. The owner decided to cash in on the legends of that place. Tracy and I broke in. This was long before it was open to the public. we explored the place and let me tell you it was fucking scary! Graffiti everywhere, old beds, padded rooms & bed straps were just a small example of the decorations. We went down in to the basement and heard someone footsteps on the main level. My first thought was that it was a cop so we went silent. The footsteps kept shifting from one side of the room to the next and we couldn't tell where they were coming from. Eventually we decided we needed to get out of there. We slipped out and I looked down the hallway and there was nothing there. Anyone who would have been there would've noticed my car parked right out front. I still don't know what it was but I know it scared the shit out of me.

Share your ghost stories if you'd like in the comments.

SLAYER!!!!!!

SLAYER rules ...

Firefly

I just finished watching the great yet short lived sci-fi series, Firefly. It is a truly amazing with its great actors and writing. It's a shame that they didn't continue on with it. I need to still check out Serenity though. While Firefly was incredible I still think that Enterprise was a tad better. Maybe because the series lasted nearly four seasons and it had more time to develop the characters. Firefly borrowed some of its content from Star Wars as well. Captain Reynolds was clearly mapped from Han Solo and the Companion was the Princess lea. Jayne was sort of the Chewbacca character and River was in a strange way the Yoda/Luke Skywalker. Nevertheless it was a great sci-fi adventure definitely worth checking out FOR FREE at hulu!!!!! If you are interested in sci-fi I also highly recommend Star Trek: Enterprise and the sci-fi channel miniseries Taken. You will not be disappointed.

Fucking Anthrax!!!!

So Long Horsies :(

FROM THE ST. LOUIS POST DISPATCH



(St. Louis) Inbev, with their recent acquisition of Anheuser-Busch Inc. which has sent shock waves throughout St. louis and the world has recently announced the first of many changes to the corporate structure of the combined corporation now known as Anheuser-Busch Inbev.

"We've decided that the continued housing and boarding of the Clydesdale Team is far too costly to continue", said Jasper Voorhees, spokesman for Inbev which is based in Belgium. Voorhees continued, "The Clydesdale Team are a bygone symbol of Anheuser-Busch. We decided that it's time has come so we opted to cut funding and had them remanded to the County Humane Society near their home in St. Louis"

"Inbev is known for the lean running of it's business", Said Mitch Alder, Chairman of the St. Louis Business Association. "This is an outrage. First they forcibly acquire a company that is a symbol of America and then they dispose of the symbol of the company!"

The Clydesdale became a symbol of the Anheuser-Busch beer company when August A. Busch II (Gussie Busch) told his father (then current President of Anheuser Busch) that he needed to come see the new Lincoln car he had purchased. After admonishing "Gussie" that purchasing a new luxury vehicle during the depression was unwise, he came out of the brewery in St. Louis and discovered to his delight a new Studebaker Beer Wagon and a perfectly conformed Six Horse Hitch of Clydesdales. Since that time, the Budweiser Clydesdales have appeared in many of their television commercials.

"We are sure they will find a loving and permanent home. The people of the United States love and admire horses, they have long been a symbol of your country since its inception. Here in Belgium horses are loved in much the same way except, we also eat them regularly" Voorhees concluded.



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------- BY THE WAY... THIS IS MADE UP BULLSHIT BY ME

David Alan Grier and the cougar

Last night my roommate and I went to the Aladdin Theater in Portland to see comedian David Alan Grier. Opening for him was an unknown yet not unfunny comedian called Kenny Avery. While I don't remember much of his bit, I must say I will never forget the joke comparing his pot-belly to Quato from Total Recall. David Alan Grier came out and completely brought down the house. The only stand up routine I've ever seen that was better was definitely The great George Carlin. Most comedians can't hang with Carlin with the exceptions of Bill Hicks, Joe Rogan, Mark G, David Alan Grier, Sam Kinison .... I was sitting in the front row next to this 40ish maybe 50's redhead(dyed) woman. I struck up a conversation with her and Trevor seems to think she wanted to hook up with me. I can't say I wasn't getting that vibe myself. What can I say? I read both of K-Flex's books on the game ... The Mack Within and The Art of Mackin'. I got that game locked and loaded! I spit game like a spitting cobra spits deadly venom! After the show I could've offered her a drink and told Trevor, "happy trails buddy!" Instead I decided to be the responsible friend and roommate and make sure Trevor got to wherever he was going! That's How I roll, Bro's Before Ho's!

The great Champaign ... from Champaign!

Pauli Carman is one of the greatest overlooked R & B singers from the 80s and 90s. Anyone from Champaign-Urbana should make sure you see and support Pauli Carman and his band at the Urbana Sweet Corn Festival this August!

Attention: Assholes ....

Traffic on I-5 North is usually a cluster about 3pm-6pm. So when you jerk-offs are traveling home after your workday please try and remember this ...

Next one of you shit-for-brains motherfuckers that decides to use the exit only lane for I-405 as a way to pass EVERYONE instead of waiting patiently to be let in is going to feel the wrath of my 80,000 lbs. of anger otherwise known as Bud Light Truck!!! You cocksuckers do it every fucking day and I hate you all. You should be thankful my truck isn't equipped with a fucking turret and a scope because I'd pick every one of you turdburglers off one by shitty one.

YOU are the reason that traffic on I-5 sucks! Instead of merging like civilized people you feel that have to use any diabolical, cockamamie way ever imagined to get at the head of the line. Do you realize that when you do that you are creating a perfect shitstorm of traffic? Traffic is already trying to let the responsible drivers (who merge properly) in. This slows down things enough, but NOOOOOO... You have to travel up the I-405 lane and then sometimes on the shoulder to get all the way to the Swan Island exit! After that, you merge over back on to I-5 and REALLY fuck shit up. I hate you all I wish your cars would explode. Maybe even with you in them, I'm not sure. I haven't decided if I hate you that much yet.

Take heed ye sons and daughters of whores, (censored by Hortanium!) and (censored by Hortanium!) are on a seek and destroy mission...

WHAT THE SHIT??!

Animal-Human Hybrid "Chimeras"

Science is just crossing a line that shouldn't be crossed. How is this research any better than what was done by Josef Mengele? Strange times we live in.

Ewwww...

three men, carrying shovels, a crowbar and a box of condoms

When a desperate trailer park whore just wont cut the mustard ...

Inbev Buys A-B!!Inbev Buys A-B!!Inbev Buys A-B!!Inbev Buys A-B!!

"This country is finished" - George Carlin (from a recent interview with Keith Olberman)

"Guess which employees are going to be the first to get the boot? The Clydesdales, they are going to take their asses to the pound." - Ari Roberts (Ninja)

This is certainly a clear sign that our economy is in terrible shape. Belgian-Brazilian Brewer Inbev has purchased Anheuser-Busch for a mere 55 Billions dollars. It's a bargain for Inbev. One Dollar is currently worth 62 cents of one Euro. So in todays exchange value Inbev purchased Budweiser for 34.1 Billion.

While people were concerned about real or imagined terrorist threats and rumors of war from countries that may or may not be a threat a great American institution is taken over without one shot being fired. I don't get all teary eyed about symbols of patriotism although I do think that this buy out is disturbing. It's comparable to the sinking of the Titanic ... Budweiser has spent its entire history marketing itself as America's Beer for the patriotic blue or white collar working man. Then after all these years only to be quickly and rather easily taken over by a foreign owned company. The Titanic was 'unsinkable' and it ended up creating a bunch of human popsicles floating in the brisk North Atlantic Ocean. Maybe that analogy isn't the greatest ...

As a A-B employee I am extremely curious of what kinds of changes we will see in the coming years. The distributor I work for already distributes Inbev products so we wont have to endure that sudden change. I predict that the new Inbev board will change the A-B Product born on date time limits. Currently, the allowable shelf life for package beer is 110 days from the born on date, 50 days for draft beer and 365 days for FAB (Flavored Alcohol Beverage). Most Inbev products have a 365 day shelf life so I think it's only a matter of time before they extend the shelf life. Inbev will also expand Budweiser in emerging foreign markets. But I think that might just compensate for the loss of revenue they will experience in the United States. There are many Deliverance type folks that will be upset from this and might abandon the brand. Only time will tell.

Bernie Mac

Bernie Mac recently appeared at a fundraiser for Barack Obama. The audience didn't appreciate his jokes. One of the jokes went something like this ... My little boy came up to me and said, "Dad, whats the difference between a hypothetical questions and a realistic question?" I told the boy, "I'm not sure but go upstairs and ask your mother if she'd make love to the mailman for $50,000."

A person in the audience heckled him and said, "Thats not funny! Bring on Barack!"

I just have to say to that ... Sir, you are wrong! That joke is fucking hilarious! You're a dumbass and fuck off.

My Pet Goat

The life of a United States President is, by nature, very transparent. Between scheduled meetings, press conferences, Vacations and golf games, a U.S. President is under the eye of public scrutiny for most of their term in office. Today I was watching a documentary entitled "9/11 Chronicles: Truth Rising" by documentary film maker Alex Jones. In it he showed the widely shown clip of President Bush reading the book, My Pet Goat to a bunch of kids in a classroom. I thought to myself today that this has got to be one of the most cliche' alibis. For example: Mr. Smith, what were your whereabouts and what were you doing when the man your wife has been having an affair with was found with a Columbian Necktie ? Ahhhh.. I was sitting in a classroom reading a children's book to third graders! I have 31 witnesses including the teacher! All the while the man hired a hitman to rip the adulterous man's tongue through his throat. I Just think that it is funny that the orches-traitors of 9/11 would have Bush doing that at the moment of the attacks. Since then, when was the last time he has read to school children or served food in a soup kitchen? Bush is the focal point of many 9/11 truthers disgust. I think it's important to remember that there are many cogs in the great wheel. Bush is really just the face of the operation.

Skateboard Fights Back!!!

Extreme videos

Drivers in Portland!

To preface this entire rant I must first point out that I am a professional driver. The order goes something like this...

1) God
2) Stunt Driver (drifting, drag racing, etc)
3) Nascar or Indycar Driver
4) Class-A CDL Drivers (Me)
5) Non Class-A CDL Delivery Drivers
6) A Kid Operating a Powerwheel
7) A Small Child Playing With A Toy Car
8) A Crackhead Driving A Car Without A License
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456,265,127, 033) Your Average Class-C Portland Area Driver

For the love of God people! What the fuck do you call this shit you do? It's incredible...
First thing I must bitch about is the crosswalk laws! This is retarded, nothing less. It's stupid because I think it has the potential to cause car crashes, pedestrian injuries and deaths. Countless times when I've stopped for a pedestrian using the crosswalk, the person in the lane next to me (going the same direction as me) will not stop and nearly kill the pedestrian. You can't blame the pedestrian for this and it's even hard to blame the driver because no one can see anything! I'm from Illinois and there, if you walk out into the street with oncoming traffic they'll just run you over. As well they should! People need to have more respect for these 5000 lbs. chunks of rubber, steel and plastic barreling down the street with idiots at the controls. A girl I once knew, Jocelyn Latka, was hit and killed near 39th and Taylor street. Now Jocelyn was no idiot, she was actually really bright. Sometimes I wonder if she crossed the street thinking the truck wouldn't proceed until she was across? We'll never know because shes dead. We must stop this ensuing bloodbath and changes the pedestrian crosswalk laws.

Another issue with Portland drivers I have is this... You Motherfuckers are too damned cautious!
I've said for a long time that overly cautious drivers cause far more wrecks than a normal cautious or even a lower than normal cautious driver. Of course you dumbshits aren't cautious enough to watch out for people who might peek their heads around a crosswalk! That's the one exception to the rule. Otherwise you slow to a pathetic crawl if it starts to sprinkle outside. I have no idea what thats about since It rains 364 days a year in Portland. You'd think you'd learn how to drive in the rain. And god forbid it snows! I've never seen such a collection of piss-ants in my life! Pull over and chain up if you need to.

I have no idea what this is about but I do know if makes me crazy. Why do some people stop 500 feet behind the car in front of them at a red light? Do you have no depth perception? It takes a special kind of asshole to do this. In times like this it would be nice to be driving a Monster Truck instead of a beer truck. Please people, it makes you look really stupid and it makes you look like an pretentious asshole. Kind of like these people who park their cars in a parking lot and park horizontally in a vertical parking spot. Every time I see that I pray with all my heart to god that a shopping cart would come down out of heaven and put a huge dent right in the car door.

Portland drivers just need to re-study the basic rules of the road. I see people who are going straight through a green light but stop to let the person making a left turn go. All the while they are preventing the normal flow of traffic. STOP IT!!!!

Finally I need to say to everyone... When I am making a turn in my semi and it appears that my tractor is going to ram your car because I swung out so far in the intersection... don
t worry! I AM NOT GOING TO HIT YOU... I have to swing out and make wide turns to give my trailer enough room to clear the curb and not take out any light posts or pedestrians. So quit getting that horrified look on your faces. If I did fuck up and hit your car it wouldn't kill you anyway. I am only going maybe 7 mph tops. You would get a new or fixed car and probably alot of money if that happened so you should hope I hit you... Quit driving so nice, watch out for pedestrians, Drive with a normal amount of caution and do it aggressively, pull up all the way at an intersection and stay out of my way!

Andre Eggletion explains why the United States is doomed.

Patriot Andre Eggletion on Coast to Coast AM with Rollye James explains why the economy of the United States is in dire trouble - PART HANA

PART DUL

PART SET

PART NET

Delivering Beer In Portland, Oregon

Really REALLY REALLY SUCKS!!!